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I've had a very busy and stressful week, which included a car crash and doing a painting. Painting was actually some time out but I don't have an art studio, so paints everywhere in my bedroom become more stress, so they have to go away until I'm ready to do another painting. In the middle of this, I was notified that I was awarded a Red Ribbon for my memoir, Bipolar Courage: Are You Sure You're Not Autistic? 
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I still haven't done everything on my list, since I published my book. Partly because I haven't felt motivated to, as my Dad died the same week. Last night I cleared out a few things from my wardrobe. I came across some notebooks with amusing anecdotes from when my son was little. This anecdote keeps playing through my head.  What a nightmare but the final formatting for my memoir for the print book is done. Doing the headers and footers sounds straight forward but it's not intuitive on the program. Different headers for left and right. Headers and page numbers to start after front matter, with page 1 that is not literally the first printed page. With every book I have self-published, this stage of formatting been the most confusing and frustrating part to get right. Of course, you can pay for someone big bucks to do this but there is a certain satisfaction in doing challenging things yourself. I have done this process a total of 4 times now (forget each time how). 
Disclaimer: I'm not a legal professional. This is not legal advice. I'm up to the final technical aspects before I self-publish my memoir, about some behind-the-scenes drama in the online world. The focus is an intense connection with an autistic man, during the advocacy journey. I've been looking up about including a disclaimer, which is a statement about the limitations and alterations in the writing. It generally goes after the copyright information, on the copyright page, so all the legal stuff is in one place.  I was editing a bit of my memoir, Bipolar Courage: Are you sure you're not autistic? The story is written and I'm two-thirds of the way through, polishing it, best I can. I was quite amused at my own writing, which I cross-checked with a video, as I wasn't sure if I'd lip-synched or sang along to a song. I laughed when I watched some of it back.  Devine Fire Goddess, acrylics on canvas by Xanthe Wyse I've been working on a memoir the past 18 months or so. I'm up to the final editing and proof-reading stages. I feel a bit worried I have broken lots of rules of grammar but then I think, 'Stuff it!' There are too many grammar snobs out there, hung up on rules, yet write boring stories. I've just had a chat to a friend who has taught English and German for years. She said that a lot of people, including American writers, are being more flexible about grammar these days. Overly formal grammar can sound stuffy and take away from the essense of the story and expression.  Unspoken Voice, acrylics on canvas by X. Wyse I was writing a blog post about 'textationships' or virtual, text-based relationships. I wrote this section, then decided to put it into its own blog post, as I'd gone off on a tangent. Tangents is part of my creative process. It's not possible to write memoir without other people being mentioned in it. Otherwise, memoirs would be a very self-indulgent and quite boring account, unless they stay vague and superficial. Or else go off into fantasyland, which then makes it more likely to go into fiction territory.  Together, acrylics on canvas board by X. Wyse I came across the term 'textationship' today. Obviously, from combining 'texting' and 'relationship'. Defined as a romantic, sexual or platonic virtual relationship that is mostly via texting or messaging. Seen by many as as inferior to a 'real' relationship that involves face-to-face communication and physical touch. Judged by some as a 'pseudo-relationship' with false intimacy. One of the core themes in my memoir, Bipolar Courage: are you sure you're not autistic? is asking the question, 'Are online relationships real?' I will let the reader decide for themselves. I am anticipating to self-publish the memoir by September 2023.  Dance, acrylics on canvas board by Xanthe Wyse Some draft extracts from my memoir, Bipolar Courage: are you sure you're not autistic? Expecting to self-publish it by September 2023. The memoir focuses on my connection with 'Maxwell'. I was fascinated by his complexity. I'd met my equal as far as complexity goes and I wanted to figure out how Maxwell ticked, as well as figuring out my own mind. I think I've succeeded doing this, hence I am excited about the book, which shows the big picture as well as the details. I want to do this story justice.  Manuka Y from a set of 4 similar paintings called Manuka XWYZ The account, Passionate Intensity, no longer exists but it's what I'm currently writing about. I took some screenshots as memory triggers, before deleting it, to help me sequence timelines as accurately as I can, only shifting things back and forth a little if it fits better with my storytelling themes. I was 'in disguise' in plain sight. The account was made for Maxwell. I feel sure he recognised me, as he replied to me in Deutsch and there was a bit of cryptic back and forth with our bios. In my memoir, I will give the bigger picture of what happened and why I did what I did and what had happened before and after.  Forget-me-not. From a cut-up painting by Xanthe Wyse |
Xanthe Wyse('Zan-thee Wise'). 
Disclaimer: the author of this blog is not an expert by profession and her opinions should not be taken as expert advice.
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