Shedding some tears, listening to Missing You (John Waite) on a loop, as I am nearing completion of my manuscript for Bipolar Courage: are you sure you're not autistic? It's an unconventional love story.
'Zander' is my son. 'Maxwell' is a man I had an intense connection with. (Not their real names). Both diagnosed Asperger's Syndrome (since merged into Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).
I've been separated from Zander since he looked like the portrait. I tend to paint my stories before I write them. I've included a few extracts from my manuscript, below.
One of the great things about being an independent 'indie' author, is that I can choose my own publication date. With flexibility to move things around, if I need to.
I had therapy today (for PTSD). My clinicial psychologist asked, 'Why September?' as that's the month I'm aiming for. In this blog post, I'll give a few reasons why, with a little context.
A very talented artist friend asked me if I'd intended for my fire goddess painting to be named 'Devine' rather than 'Divine.' I actually checked back and her name is definitely 'Devine.' She's mentioned in my memoir, now in the polishing stages.
I don't want to drastically alter the manuscript, so I've been writing some blog posts with additional linked information, for those interested in my creative process.
The memoir I'm currently finalising, is probably way more accurate than a typical memoir, as I've spent a lot of time cross-checking my journals, vlog etc. I decided to cross-check about the origins of why I chose 'Devine.'
Listening to music while I'm doing the final editing of my manuscript. Music helps me to stay focused, to process and helps buffer the difficult themes. I have just edited a very triggering chapter halfway through my memoir, Bipolar Courage: are you sure you're not autistic? Triggering as it has themes like suicide (which I haven't detailed here).
A song came on that I don't recall hearing before, 'Private Emotion,' by Ricky Martin featuring Meja. I listened to it several times while working on this chapter plus this little snippet in a blog post. This book is my most emotionally vulnerable yet, about an intense connection and occasional clashes with an autistic man, Maxwell. Then, I listened to 'Fly Away' by Lenny Kravitz.
I came across the term 'textationship' today. Obviously, from combining 'texting' and 'relationship'. Defined as a romantic, sexual or platonic virtual relationship that is mostly via texting or messaging. Seen by many as as inferior to a 'real' relationship that involves face-to-face communication and physical touch. Judged by some as a 'pseudo-relationship' with false intimacy.
One of the core themes in my memoir, Bipolar Courage: are you sure you're not autistic? is asking the question, 'Are online relationships real?' I will let the reader decide for themselves. I am anticipating to self-publish the memoir by September 2023.
Just another draft extract from my memoir, that I've just written, going off on a little tangent. Tangents are my thing, so I can't avoid them completely. I decided to share it here, just in case it doesn't make the final cull (for practicalities of book length). It's an unconventional love story.
Disclaimer: the author of this blog is not an expert by profession and her opinions should not be taken as expert advice.